Seriously. Two years of chemistry all went to waste. Sigh. It was my fault. I started studying last minute and that wasn’t going to help. :/
We’re no longer as close and others are starting to realize it. You’re replacing me in a way and it hurts me but what am I suppose to do. If I tell you, you’ll just say I replaced you a long time ago even though that’s not true at all. I guess what I’m trying to say is sorry.
Seems like I’ve been getting these more than ever now. Today, even the smallest thing ticked me off. The slightest action someone would do.
You say the harshest things, you want me to do everything according to your preference, I’m tired of you. Go away. I don’t even know what kind of friend are you. You hurt my feelings constantly and expect me to get over it. I do but sometimes I can’t hold everything back anymore. I don’t care if that’s just how you are. You’re an asshole.
I have no friends, everyone is alone in this life, it’s normal. I just have to understand that so I don’t let myself get hurt again.
No one understands me, not even that one person I thought might.
My tiredness led to the dispute between Timothy and I. It just brought my entire mood down after that.
I fell asleep and my mother decided to use that as an argument. We went on for about 15 minutes. My father got involved and they started arguing. He got frustrated and broke my mirror. I couldn’t stop crying.
I check my phone, I saw a text from Imtiaz. Somehow his text made me cry even more. “You know what? It’s whatever. I really hope you learn not to just keep running away from your problems. And I hope you and Timothy patch things up. This is the last time I’m saying this. Good night.” Maybe it was just the timing of which I read it.
My point made, I was having a horrible day. One thing led by another.
I can’t wait till I move out of this family. My parents are just labels. They’re my parents but they don’t act like them. They don’t understand anything. They don’t understand the things they say hurts, they don’t care about my opinions, I can’t ever talk to them about anything. Sigh. I hate the so called parent children relationship we have. This is why I know I would try to be best friends with mine, talk to them, try to understand their point of view. I want them to have what I didn’t have. Everyone deserves a relationship with their parents like that.
There’s no one ever there when I truly need them.
What the hell is happening to us? All we ever do is upset each other, ruin each other’s mood. Ugh. Fucking shit.
You don’t know how it is for me. Since I’ve been in a relationship with you, I’ve lost friends but I always tell myself, I don’t need them. I have you. That’s how much more I value you over them and you’re going to say I have friends I value more? You are kidding? I know you’ve sacrificed many things for me but sometimes I feel like you don’t acknowledge any of the things I do for you unless I personally tell you about them.
